State of Siege
One finished proposal
Welcome to my newest readers, fellow bibliophiles, and educators!
On My Desk
To achieve anything today, an artist has to develop a conscious strictness in respect of time which in former ages might have seemed neurotic and selfish, for he must never forget that he is living in a state of siege. —W.H. Auden
I feel this in my bones. A state of siege indeed.
When I first took a crack at writing middle grade fiction in 2018, I quickly joined the 5 am writers’ club. The ideal was to rise before dawn, before work, before the family, and simply write for one solid hour. I lasted 4 months.
As a working mom teaching full-time, I was already tired. I couldn’t keep the pace.
I next resolved to write for a few hours each night as I had in grad school. After dinner, I would shut my bedroom door and stay at my desk from 7-10 pm. Surely it would work. And it did. Sometimes.
Without the pressure of submitting an essay or adding to an online discussion, though, I quickly caved to comfort at the end of the work day. Deadlines had been a worthy impetus for years. Had.
That may be why a self-imposed deadline is so hard to adhere to at the moment. If I postpone a day, a month, a year, who will know? Who will care?
I will.
When I published my post, “A Birth Announcement” on September 1, I was serious. I wanted accountability. “If I tell people,” I thought, “then I have to do it.” The truth is that I was scared. It took me two days to click “publish” on that post. One post.
The Humble Fig needs to be written. I know that. I am chipping away at it as I finish the book proposal. But I am also embracing something else, a tension I didn’t know how to describe until a few weeks ago when I read Os Guinness’ The Call for the first time.
Do we feel the wonder of being called? It is all a gift and all of grace. And contrary to expectations, grace is not a matter of God’s welcoming the lawbreaker as well as the law-abiding, the disreputable along with the respectable, the prodigal son as well as the stay-at-home.
Quite the reverse. Pride is the first and worst sin, so grace is most amazing when it embraces the fruits of pride rather than the fruits of gluttony or lust, when it reaches the Pharisee soul rather than the profligate Mary Magalene, when it wins the proud person made prouder still by calling rather than the sinner feeling unworthy to be addressed.
Only grace can dissolve the hard, solitary, vaunting “I” of the sin of pride in each of us. But the good news is that it does.
“I” will stand out of the way. Pride, fear, and doubt may be near, but they are not my companions. They are the hostile crowd of the back row, and hopefully, the shambles of the enemy’s siegeworks.
I ask for your prayers. My cover letters are written, chapter outline complete, and book proposal finished. I intend to submit to two publishing houses tomorrow and two more next week. Please pray for me, for confidence and courage to bring all of these good things to God’s completion. His design, not mine.
Around the Web
I like to share meaty or fascinating (or fascinatingly meaty!) articles and books in my newsletter normally, but as promised, I turn to all things festive with some early Christmas recommendations. A few years back I wrote a fun article for The Imaginative Conservative, Five Affordable Shops for Bibliophiles, but here are my latest top three “gift shops”:
Out of Print offers many bookish gifts year round. Their new Emily Henry line is lively and bright plus they have so many clever socks!
Artist Emily Lex has released her Christmas line of gift tags, stickers, notecards, tea towels, and my favorite—watercolor workbooks. I could easily spend $100 here!
Smidgen Press continues to amaze me. Just released, the L.M. Montgomery Christmas Collection includes Anne excerpts, poetry, and short stories with vintage illustrations. It ships from the UK, so be sure to order early if you live in the States.
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Do comment or feel free to email me. And don't forget that the List Library at my website is always available to you, my readers. The book lists are great printable gifts or seasonal lists for any book lover!
Christine
I so resonated with the part about the joy of our calling. For me, whatever is growing in my heart, is getting ready to overflow on the page, but not on the productivity schedule of the world. From faith to faith. It's been such a heart-washing, reliance, to trust, depend - wait, and also cultivate in earnest. Time and again, I find that His grace gives abundant "time," to complete the work. Yet, not on the terms that give the flesh comfort! Press on in this conviction to complete this book. May it be so blessed - the process itself a blessing.